THE KIND OF FOREPLAY HE CRAVES
Dana's Passion - Educating and Empowering Women
There's a persistent myth floating around that men don't dig presex play, that all they really crave is a grope here and a nibble there and, bam, they're prepped for action. Not true. Not one bit true. The mix-up lies in the fact that guys simply desire a different type of foreplay than women do — moves that take into account the way guys' brains work and erogenous zones specific to a dude's body, explains Carole Altman, PhD, author of You Can Be Your Own Sex Therapist. Here, we detail six man-pleasing moves that will slowly bring his lust to a boil.
Really Seeing You Naked
Even if you've stripped down with your guy before, there's a good chance that he's never feasted his eyes on your completely bare bod for more than a few seconds. Maybe it's because you undress quickly in a passion frenzy or your bodies are too close for him to really take you in. But it's a surefire libido trigger.
"When a man sees a sexy image, his testosterone levels rise, spiking his sex drive," says Altman. "The longer you let his eyes linger, the more aroused he'll be." Plus, you'll feel sex-kittenish knowing he's so mesmerized by your form.
While he's on the bed, peel off your clothes slowly. Keep the lights on and tell him he can look but not touch. Swivel around and let him view you from different angles, then lean into him for a few close-ups. To draw his gaze to a certain body region, brush your fingers over it or cup it in your hands. Or keep the area covered for a bit — by wearing a lacy bra or boy shorts. "When you finally remove that last item, he'll feel like he's seeing something taboo, which is a turn-on in itself," says Altman.
Hearing How Excited He Gets You
Before any touching has taken place, lie close to your man and whisper how hot he's made you. "Most men aren't used to softer, sensual talk, but it creates so much anticipation," says Yvonne K. Fulbright, author of The Hot Guide to Safer Sex.
Don't be afraid to be explicit — for example, tell him how tingly you are down below. Once he's under your spell, graze your fingers precariously close to his private parts. "By physically hinting at the action to come, his desire will be on fire," she adds.
Having Two Body Parts Pleasured at Once
After planting your lips lightly against his, coax his tongue gently into your mouth. "Gradually make your kiss more urgent by licking and then sucking the tip of his tongue," says New York City sex therapist Joy Davidson, PhD, author of Fearless Sex. "This suggests a primal kind of passion guys love."
While you're thrilling him with your mouth, slowly move one hand down to his groin and make a loose fist around his shaft. "As he gets harder, build up to coarser, tighter motions," says Davidson. The duet of sensations above and below the belt will be ultrapleasurable.
Getting His Cut Lines Licked
"Lots of men love it when a woman teases the sensitive areas we call cut lines — the creases that separate a guy's thighs from his torso," says Fulbright. But most chicks don't realize what intense erogenous zones they are.
The ultimate take-him-prisoner move: While he's on his back, scoot down so you can nibble and lick along one line, then the other. "Soft touches like these warm up the skin and awaken the nerves, so you get him ready for more direct stimulation later," says Davidson. Boost his bliss even further by gliding your tongue along each crease while his knees are bent and his legs are spread slightly. "This position will make him feel more vulnerable, magnifying every sensation your mouth makes," she says.
69...but Sideways
You already know that standard 69 — you lying on top of your man while pleasing each other orally — is smoking hot. What you may not be aware of is that it can be difficult for a guy to position himself at an angle that feels awesome for you but doesn't result in muscle strains for him.
So try this variation on how to 69: You and your dude lie on your sides, your face by his pelvis and vice versa, each of you bending one knee so you form a trianglelike frame around your private parts. "This gives him better access to your V zone, so he can pleasure you for a longer period of time as well as see your facial expression and watch how blissed out you are," says Davidson.
A Just-the-Tip Tease
This frisky finale demonstrates that foreplay doesn't end just because intercourse begins. Start by giving him the go-ahead to penetrate you slowly. Once the tip of his manhood is inside your vagina, squeeze your PC muscles — the same ones you clamp down to stop your urine flow — to prevent him from going any further.
"By pressing down, you surround the most nerve-packed part of his penis with warm, wet pressure — which is torturously arousing for him," says Davidson. Continually flex and release your grip in a steady rhythm. "Each pulse will bring him closer to climax but not close enough for him to go over the edge. This holding pattern will drive him crazy with lust," she adds.